Our Egg Donor Search Story – Joanna and Victor

Our goal in starting Tulip was to empower hopeful parents with unprecedented access, expanded choice and an easier way to search for their perfect egg donor. The fertility field has made incredible strides over the past few decades, and the development of egg donation has been amazing to witness. More and more couples turn to egg donation every year, and we are so proud to play a part in many hopeful parents’ egg donation journeys.

We love hearing positive feedback from our Members. Thank you to Joanna and Victor for sharing these words with us – you are the reason we do what we do!

The fertility battle

We began trying for a baby in 2018, and after a few months we had a gut feeling something was wrong. Our doctor cautioned us to wait and give it a chance, so we did. Then at the year mark we were back in his office. We received a diagnosis of “unexplained infertility” in 2019 and our infertility battle started. 

We completed three rounds of IVF and ICSI with our eggs and sperm. It just wasn’t working. Our fertility doctor dug in deeper, of course, and there were issues with egg quality. They basically told us that using my eggs was a no-go. I was heartbroken. I was only 31. I’ll be honest, I couldn’t accept it. 

Working through it

We started therapy around this time, because the cycles were causing us both so much stress. We took a break from trying and focused on us. I think that break really helped. And the therapy of course. We were able to focus on ourselves and what we really wanted. We became happy again. It was like a weight had been lifted, because the pressure I had been putting on myself was gone. I had to surrender. 

We weren’t talking about IVF, we were taking a break from all that, but I kept thinking about what our doctor had said about egg donation. I started researching it just by looking around on the internet. After a few months I brought it up with my husband and we decided it was time to move forward. I think we both felt more prepared this time – for any outcome. 

The egg donor search

We had grieved the loss of my fertility. I thought that would be the hard part! And it was, but I wasn’t expecting the experience we had trying to find an egg donor. We looked at our clinic and they had a select pool of donor options. I’m Asian but with a little bit of Irish and I was hoping to find someone similar to me. We didn’t have much luck finding Asian egg donors, let alone finding any mixed-race Asian egg donors. There was only one donor of a similar ethnicity at our clinic, and she was in cycle. We weren’t sure what to do. We didn’t know whether we should wait for her or move on.

I heard about Tulip through a Facebook group that I’m in – people were saying it was really helpful to have all the donors in one place. I decided to sign up for free just to see who was out there. Honestly, I was shocked. There were several hundred donors that were good matches for my ethnicity. It was crazy. Nothing wrong with our clinic donors, of course, but seeing so many Asian egg donor options (and mixed race Asian egg donors!) felt like a sign to move forward. So we did. I signed up for a Tulip Premium subscription that day.

Choosing an egg donor 

In less than a month we had matched. A month! It happened so fast. We signed the agency agreement and crossed all our fingers. Since then, our donor has passed all her screenings, and we got everything finalized. Our donor was amazing and helped us create ten healthy embryos. Our embryo transfer is next week! 

It has been such a journey up to this point. We spent so long trying and failing and just feeling like there was no hope for us. It took a lot to get over that. Then once we tried again, there was another obstacle after so many. Finding a donor of my ethnicity is like looking for a needle in a haystack. I was worried we just wouldn’t be able to do it, but Tulip made it easy. We are so grateful. We’re hoping and praying for the best as we wait and see what happens! Thank you Tulip.


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